Just sit with it

It is human nature to try to avoid pain, suffering and any other uncomfortable emotion....at all costs. Sometimes the very thing we're trying to avoid gets worse because we keep obsessing about it - try not to be anxious while thinking about it can only increase more anxiousness. Sometimes the way we "deal" with it turns out problematic like overeating, or addictions here and there. Regardless of the way, most people just hate feeling yucky, and having people you love feel yucky. I'm no exception. For the most part, most moms will do anything to keep their child from crying. It's like someone pushes the panic button and a mom will move light speed with different distractions until the child is smiling again. Pretty exhausting I would say.

I frequently find the irony in what I know is the right response, what I usually tell my clients to do, and what I actually do. You see I will usually tell my clients to simply "sit" with the emotion, no amount of anxiousness, anger, or sadness has ever killed anyone...although it can certainly feel like it. Instead of immediately running away from the emotion I ask them to embrace it, get acquainted with it, because only then can you deal with it appropriately. Easier said than done. Lately, I have decided to sit with it a lot more when it comes to my role as a mom. Especially during those days when Alex complains about everything under the sun. I find it that if I simply sit with it - frustration, exhaustion, annoyance etc. - the emotion goes away much quicker and I find myself with a clearer head to deal with the situation.

Sounds masochistic but it really isn't. Sitting with an unpleasant emotion and acknowledging that like any other emotion it will eventually go away is a very liberating feeling. You're not running away anymore you're facing it headstrong. I have found that sitting with it also applies with the good emotions. The busyness of life sometimes doesn't even allow for us to soak on good  moments...so we're literally always running towards something or away from it. Next time you find yourself feeling good or witnessing something splendid sit with it, embrace it, let it soak. Next time you find yourself feeling yucky sit with it, embrace it, let it soak.